One of the most painful and necessary lessons the Lord has taught me since starting NewSpring Church is that He does not need me, that I am not essential to the success of this church—He is.
I often talk about my near death experience from back in 2005 because it was a HUGE learning experience for me. I won’t go into details except to say that as a result of a minor surgical procedure that I experienced serious internal bleeding and nearly died in my living room. The result was about two or three days in ICU (can’t really remember, it’s all fuzzy) and then several more in a regular hospital room.
Needless to say that the entire experience drove me crazy. There I was flat on my back and could not stay awake for long periods of time. I was frustrated because I could not “get up and go;” however, I was even more frustrated because I could not lead and preach, two things I absolutely love doing.
One night I was in my bed and began to worry about the church—what would have happened to it if I would have died? Who was going to lead it during my time away? Were all the things that needed to take place going to happen? What if someone forgot to do something and I wasn’t there to make it all better?
I had fallen into the trap that so many pastors fall into—I thought the church could not function without me.
So…God put me flat on my back for several weeks in a row to show me how AWESOME He is and how unimpressive I am. During the course of my freaking out about the church He just kept telling me, “Hey Perry, the church is MY Bride, not yours…and I will take care of her!” I came face to face during my hospital stay that me being used by God is because of His grace and kindness—NOT because he just could not get things done without me.
Since then I am very up front and honest about the fact that the church does not need me to succeed, it needs Jesus. I have said from the stage many times, “Do not put your trust in Perry Noble because that will lead you straight to hell…the world does not need me, it needs Jesus!!!”
Trusting God with His church has relieved a great deal of stress in my life. Sure, I still work like crazy—I think every pastor should. But, once again, our desire and effort to work hard should come out of a desire to honor Jesus and make His name famous, not our own.
I know that a trap we can fall into as pastors is thinking that without us the church just can’t operate—but reality is that She has been beautiful for 2,000 years without us…and she will continue to be beautiful long after we are gone.
I love NewSpring Church. I love the fact that God is allowing me to serve here. BUT I am under no false pretense that I, somehow, am necessary for God’s blessings and favor to be here. We are God’s church—He is doing the building (Matthew 16:18) and our best day are ahead of us because we are dependent NOT upon a man—but rather THE MAN!