Last week we were meeting as a Senior Management Team and the conversation became a little tense…ok, it became a LOT tense.
Here are four things as the leader of that meeting that I did NOT do…
#1 - I Didn’t Try To Resolve the Tension
I dropped the notion a few years ago that meetings should be fun, happy, special events with songs, unicorns and cotton candy!
The bottom line in meetings is this…if you have leaders then every single one of them has an opinion that they are willing to fight for…and when their opinion doesn’t match up with someone else’s…spark will fly! Which…is AWESOME because a lot of issues are resolved as a result of the room becoming a little tense.
#2 - I Didn’t Try To Make Everyone Happy
One of the worst things a leader can do is try to please everyone in a meeting…which is tough because if you are anything like me you HATE unresolved tension. BUT…if the people you have at the table are big boys and girls…they can work it out.
Besides…someone COULD BE WRONG…and to try and make them happy is nothing more than you allowing yourself to facilitate dysfunction!
#3 - I Didn’t Try To Change The Subject
I used to do this a lot as a leader…an issue would be thrown out, tempers would flare and I would call for a break or try to go on to something else…
Which was never a good thing! When true feelings about a topic come out—that is the BEST time to drill down on whatever issue is out there and deal with it. Pretending it isn’t there does nothing more than actually allows for tension to exist WAY beyond the meeting.
#4 - I Didn’t Get Angry At Anyone
I love it when the guys argue in front of me. Seriously! I love to see their fire and passion. And yes, I even love it when they argue with me. (By the way…the argument should NEVER become a personal attack…that’s a sign of immaturity!)
And so…when tension exists in the room I don’t feel the need to lecture…I actually feel the need to learn. You can learn a lot about the guys & gals at your leadership table by merely sitting back and observing what they are willing to fight for. (And…if you don’t have anyone who ever fights…get them out of there!!!)
Just a few thoughts…maybe I will one day blog about what we were all fighting about! :-)